So I walked into the dentist this morning. My dentist asked me how my weekend was. I said “Good, I watched Captain America last night. I really liked it.” And my dentist says “Oh, my son is in that movie.” At first I thought he was joking but then I realized
Dr. Robert Evans
I looked it up
My dentist is Captain America’s dad
My doctor is JK Rowling’s husband.
JK Rowling’s husband has asked me if I am sexually active.
GUYS COLORED BRAS ARE NOW BANNED IN MY VOLLEYBALL TEAM BC YOU CAN KINDA SEE THEM THROUGH THE SHIRT AND OUR MALE COACHES DON’T FIND IT ACCEPTABLE BC IT’S DISTRACTING WHY ARE THEY OVERSEXUALIZING BRAS ON UNDERAGE GIRLS THEY’RE FUCKING BRAS WHY DO I HAVE TO BE TOLD WHAT TYPE OF FUCKING UNDERGARMENTS TO USE I’M SORRY I DIDN’T PAY CLOSER ATTENTION TO WHAT EVERYONE WAS TALKING ABOUT WHERE THE FUCK DO I SIGN UP FOR THE WHOLE FEMINIST MOVEMENT THING AND SHIT OH MY GO D
i hate when ppl make fun of me for trying 2 be positive and spread good vibes like fuck your bitter ass i spent a good portion of my short life being bitter and angry and suicidal if i wanna shoot sunshine out of my ass then i fuckin will
When I was just starting high school, a girl who rode my bus invited me to stay the night at her house and when I did she got really emotional and told me no girls ever stayed over because she was a lesbian and if you don’t think that’s the saddest thing ever you need to re-evaluate your life